September 20, 2011
My Dear Sweet Soul Screamers Series,
You have been both my greatest joy and my deepest sorrow.
When we first met I was looking for books just like you to fill a void. I was looking for something different. But yet something familiar. And there you were.
I had grown tired of all those vampires and angels I surrounded myself with day after day. They just didn’t excite me as they once had. But I wasn’t yet ready to let go of the thrill I got from being taken into their worlds or the endless possibilities they offered.
And then there was you. You came into my life and showed me a different, but no less exciting world. You shared with me something completely new. Something I had never before even considered, introduced me to characters I never would have thought I’d make a connection with. But I did. And that connection was so strong that I will forever be tied to you, no matter how far away from you I am.
But you did break my heart. You made me fall in love with a part of you that should never have had my love. A part of you that was so undeserving of my trust and my affection. You lured me in, you stole my heart and you gave it back to me in pieces.
It has taken me a long time now to steel my heart against that part of you. Even to this day I feel my heart fracturing when I think about it. I want to let that part of you back into my heart, but I just can’t. You’ve broken my trust and the pain of what you’ve done still brings tears to my eyes.
But it was not all bad. You were not all bad. The greatest part of you brought me happiness. And the places you took me were filled with even more excitement and danger than I could have ever imagined. When I was with you I didn’t even think of those other books. There was just you. Only you.
You captivated me. You still do. You left me breathless in the wake of some of those adventures we went on together. The highs were so very, very high and the lows seemed bottomless, an endless drop into darkness.
I have gone on this journey with you and although I know our time together has not ended, I wanted to let you know just how I feel right now. At this very moment. Because with this next chapter, this part of you that will be shared with the world in just a matter of days, you have made me fall in love with you all over again.
Where my heart was shattered, you have mended it. Where my doubts in you – in us – were once beginning to grow, they have now all but disappeared. Just this one book has turned everything around for me. For us. And I will be eternally grateful for what you have given back to me.
As is always the case with us, this new road was not without peril. You made me question everything, every step of the way. You did not make things easy. But you never do. Loving you has not been easy.
But if I wanted it to be easy, I wouldn’t have stayed with you as long as I have. For these past two years were some of the most thrilling, torturous, electrifying, heartbreaking and simply amazing ones in my life. And I can’t imagine having never met you.
I don’t know what the future has in store for us. We may only have a year left together before we say our goodbyes. But the place you left me gives me hope. It has made me excited about what our future might hold and has made believe in you. And I will follow you to the end. No matter what. Because even with all our history, these past two years have been unforgettable. They’ve left their permanent mark on me.
I have loved you from the moment I set eyes on you and that has never wavered. Through the heartbreak, pain and distrust, I love you still. It’s not every series I meet that my affection is unwavering, that I am as devoted as I am to you. But you have given everything of yourself to me on those pages, everything I could have asked for. The good and the bad, the heartache, sorrow and pain, the boundless joy and the never-ending surprises.
So for all of this that you’ve given me and will continue to give, I am certain, I wanted to let you know just how how much meeting you and loving you has meant to me.