As a blogger some days it’s hard to remember that it’s about the books.

Some days are spent creating and formatting posts for blog tours and weekly features. Some days are spent trying to write those reviews that still don’t come easy. Some days are spent thinking up new things to do on the blog… some new idea that hasn’t been done over and over across the book blogosphere.

Some days are spent trying to maintain a social presence, be responsive to emails, visit other blogs, keep up with the latest news.

Some days those books just don’t get any attention. And sometimes those days turn into a week… or more.

Trying to keep up with blog maintenance, trying not to be left out of the loop, trying not to be forgotten as a member of the community takes time away from reading.

In fact, it is very possible to be a book blogger without actually reading or reviewing any books. The reality of which blows the mind.

Because it is possible to spend time promoting books you want to read without actually reading them. You can even promote those you aren’t in the least bit interested in reading. It’s more than possible to be able to create book release posts without actually reading those releases. To participate in a book blast or book tour you do not have to actually read the book. And there is no reading required for putting together discussion posts.

Even most memes don’t require you to actually have read the books you’re talking about. Selective meme-ing will allow you to participate without reading a single word. While those teaser memes require you to actually crack open the book to find a teaser, they don’t require more than that if you don’t want to, or don’t have the time to, do more.

And while some will say reviews are a must, they aren’t. Not really. For most bloggers book reviews are the least trafficked posts. They’re the posts that get the least comment love. They’re the posts that often require the most effort and get the smallest reward. Perhaps to be taken seriously as a book blogger you have to review books. But it’s not a requirement. You can be just as effective a promotional vehicle with or without a review.

But if you feel reviews are required on the blog, you can always take on guest reviewers.

Yes, there are many, many ways to be a book blogger without actually being a reader. With enough skill and dedication it is possible to even be successful at it.

But… WAIT…. Why?

Why would anyone want to blog about books without actually reading them? Why would anyone want to be a part of a community that’s purportedly filled with book lovers if they rarely get the opportunity to read those books? And why would anyone promote books if they were looking for reasons not to read?

Yet being a blogger sometimes requires each of these things. Sometimes it requires all of them. So, why exactly do we do it?

As a book lover my heart breaks a little when I find myself too tired to read. When perusing my unread books on my shelves or on my eReaders I am terribly saddened by the fact that they await my attention.

As much as I do love blogging, I miss the days when I was just a reader. I miss being able to read a book that I loved and just let it sit for awhile before cracking open the next one. I miss being able to re-read books as often as I used to. I miss just being able to read.

And I often wonder if blogging and all that comes with it is worth the sacrifice of not being able to read as much as I’d like to.

With all the tours and promotional events I’m involved with, I often feel guilty because it means less time for reading and writing those reviews. And on those rare days when reading feels like work rather than pleasure I have to fight the urge to give it all up. Because, for me, being a blogger is not worth losing my passion for reading.

But, just as in life, it’s so very easy to get caught up in the day-to-day. It’s easy to forget about the books amidst the deadlines, deluge of email and other demands that come with being a blogger. It’s easy to get caught up in the frenzy to be a part of the latest and greatest book tour or bookish event.

And, of course, it’s so easy to be distracted by the drama.

I see more posts, tweets, comments relating to drama than those just gushing about books. I don’t remember the last time I had a lengthy conversation about a book I loved, but I can pinpoint the exact time I talked with someone about bookish drama.

Yes, this also breaks my heart.

With everything that goes on in the blogosphere it’s way too easy to just be a blogger and forget that there’s supposed to be the word “book” in front of it. So it’s something that I try to remind myself on a daily basis when faced with opportunities to be part of tours, blasts, cover reveals, events and other distractions from reading that this community provides.

And while I realize that there is a tradeoff – there are only 24 hours in a day, after all – I ask myself just how fair, exactly, is the trade? Is the blog winning or are the books? How many hours are spent reading versus those spent composing posts, writing reviews, being social?

And when the balance shifts a little too heavily in favor of blogging I try with all my might to shift things back to books. After all, it’s supposed to be all about the books, isn’t it?

In marketing, email newsletters are a way to get the word out about your product or service quickly and to the broadest audience possible. And with newsletter distribution services like Mail Chimp or Constant Contact, there’s a way to track the effectiveness of your letter. Yes, there are statistics which tell the sender how many were opened, how many were clicked through, et cetera.

As with most communications these days there has to be some form of “opt out” to the subscription. Spammers aren’t taken kindly to, and not offering a way for the recipient to unsubscribe has consequences. There is a law, in fact, set forth by the CAN-SPAM Act that mandates this.

But when receiving a “spam” newsletter – one that you didn’t purposely subscribe to – opening it and clicking “unsubscribe” does have a risk. That newsletter might not be a legitimate piece of marketing from a reputable organization. It could be the type of spam that if you were to click a link, it could install a virus on your computer, it could take you to a site where it logs your IP address, run a script that will cause your entire contact list to be spammed, or do something much worse.

If you don’t know who sent the newsletter, or whether it is “legitimate” spam or “harmful” spam, clicking to unsubscribe can be risky. And it might not be a risk you’re willing to take.

You can mark it as spam for your email to sort out. But that doesn’t rid you of the problem. You still see those messages in your spam folder every day, week, month. You’re still required to take action. Even if that action is simply to delete the message. It can be mildly annoying if it is weekly or less frequently and if it is just the one. It can be much more of a nuisance if the email is daily and if there are multiple emails that you have to contend with.

Being marketed to is part and parcel of being a blogger. But being added to a mass distribution list for products or services that may not be targeted to just what your particular area of interest is, can be a hassle. Especially when unsubscribing isn’t quite as simple as clicking the generic link in a Mail Chimp or Constant Contact list that is unmonitored or sent by a marketing company.

When unsubscribing means responding by email to the sender directly, it can make some bloggers uncomfortable. Even clicking “unsubscribe” to an author, blogger or publisher’s newsletter can have the same result, as that action will be recorded and could be seen by them. With the occasional clashes in the blogosphere between bloggers, or between bloggers and authors, some may feel opting out could result in drama and would rather live with the annoyance than risk bad blood.

When the act of unsubscribing can result in hurt feelings or insults, it makes it that much more complicated. Whether it’s to an author’s or publisher’s newsletter or even another blogger’s, some may choose to live with the tens or hundreds of daily correspondences versus act. Personal feelings should not be an issue, yet unfortunately sometimes they are. Which is why there are some who choose to reach out after an unsubscribe to ask why.

This act of reaching out looking for a reason, unless it’s an auto-generated survey type of questionnaire, is yet another reason why some might feel hesitant to unsubscribe when spammed. Having to explain oneself for not wanting to receive yet another email, or why they aren’t interested in the product or service to the person whose service or product it is, puts the blogger in a position that is awkward and uncomfortable.

These newsletters or other mass email distributions are a way for someone to spread the word about their book, editing service, tour company, or even themselves. It’s mass marketing. It shouldn’t have a personal component. Someone subscribed without their consent shouldn’t be made to feel awkward about not wanting their email inboxes to be filled with newsletters or generic outreach emails.

In marketing, finding a balance can be hard, but making a good first impression is still important. And if that first impression is subscribing someone to a series of mass email distributions without their consent, it won’t likely be a positive one. And putting the recipient in a position that makes them feel uncomfortable if they have to take action, definitely won’t.

So what can you do if you want to reach out to a large group of people on a regular basis with news and updates?

Invite them to subscribe. Send one email out with a link asking if they’d like to subscribe instead of simply added them to a mass distribution list without their consent. A single email campaign has the potential to be just as effective, perhaps more so, than adding them to a list and spamming them with a series of emails they didn’t request, don’t want, or aren’t in line with their interests.

If an invitation is not an option, then use a service like Mail Chimp or Constant Contact with an easy “opt out” button. But don’t reach out to those who unsubscribe and make it personal. Don’t send an introductory newsletter that starts off with “Hello new subscribers!” to those who haven’t chosen to subscribe. Don’t send the newsletters with such frequency that it will appear to be spam to those who might have actually been interested in the content. And if you don’t want your content to be seen as spam, when creating lists of those to reach out to, be sure that those on the lists are appropriate for the outreach.

Subscribing implies continued communication. And if the person being subscribed isn’t the one who opted to do so, making sure they are the right audience for said communication and making it easy for them to opt out if they aren’t, can help to ensure that you aren’t labeled a spammer.

My Thoughts

While I have no problem with outreach, whether marketing or otherwise, I cannot stand being subscribed to something without my consent. I have a hard enough time managing those emails and newsletters I have chosen to subscribe to. I hate having to spend even a fraction of a second with each unwanted email newsletter I receive.

The time spent dealing with unwanted subscriptions could have been time I spent responding to email I should be responding to. And having an email box filled with subscriptions I didn’t ask for makes me hide from it even more than I already do.

Being invited to subscribe makes me feel like the choice is mine, and sometimes I actually do subscribe when invited. Especially if the information is something of interest. But having the choice made for me makes me instantly dislike the product or service. It’s one of those knee-jerk reactions I get, like when someone tells me something I must do, see, read or watch.

And when there are security concerns, or if unsubscribing means dealing directly with the individual that subscribed me, it puts me in a position I don’t like to be in. And so I live with – and cringe every time I receive – unwanted email subscriptions.

I don’t click links in emails unless I absolutely trust the sender. And I don’t like confrontation. So being subscribed without my consent means that I spend just a little bit of time each day angry or upset when checking my email, feeling very much like the spammer’s hostage.

I mean, seriously, who doesn’t like to be invited versus forced?

What Do You Think?

Do you have any qualms about clicking to unsubscribe?

Do you fear that the spam is of the “harmful” variety and refuse to click to unsubscribe? Or is the risk of a virus, or worse, worth it to not receive the unwanted emails?

Is unsubscribing when it’s through a form easier than reaching out to an individual? Or do you have no problem telling the sender to remove you from their list? After all, they signed you up without your consent, why should you be made to feel uncomfortable.

Have you ever encountered someone who responded to your request to unsubscribe with a question as to why? Have you responded to them a second time or have you simply chosen to ignore them? And have you ever had an unpleasant situation result from having requested to be removed from a mailing list or group?

What are your thoughts on being subscribed?

There are many ways that bloggers can be made to feel pressure and stress. One of those ways, in particular, is the pressure to perform.

When a blogger has achieved a certain standard with their reviews or posts, they’re expected to meet that standard from that point forward. Their readers come to expect that level of information and insight because that blogger has reached that level in the past.

If that blogger has been labeled the “go to” blogger for information about any number of subjects, they’re expected to have that information at the ready for all. If they’re labeled the most insightful reviewer, all reviews must therefore be insightful. If they offer up the most interesting topics for their memes, ask the most interesting questions for their author interviews, put forth the most interesting discussion questions, invite the most interesting guests to post, then time after time they will be expected to perform as they have previously.

While labels like “best” or “most” or “top” or “expert” offer a great boost to the ego, they also serve to heap on the stress and pressure to consistently be the best, be the expert, perform at top, and give, be, offer the most of whatever it is that’s expected of them.

And that expectation can lead to performance anxiety, bad blogger behavior or even failure to perform altogether. None of which are particularly good. Not for the blogger. And not for the blog’s readers.

Being anxious about how a review or post will be received will always be a part of blogging. But if the blogger perceives they must meet a higher standard for their posts or reviews, that level of pressure can be crippling. And for those who blog daily, the expectations – whether self-imposed or external – can be unrealistic.

Bloggers can’t always be expected to put forth “perfect” posts. They can’t always be expected to have original content. They can’t always be expected to be thoughtful or insightful or fluid with their thoughts or words. Especially not if they blog daily.

When writers have an off day, they put down their laptops and find other ways to occupy themselves until they get their mojo back. Bloggers don’t always have that luxury. But they do have alternatives.

They aren’t as stuck as they might think they are. They don’t always have to perform at the top of their game to appease their readers. They shouldn’t feel the need to resort to idea theft or to hide from the interwebs until they can deliver what they feel is expected of them.

Especially given the fact that, for the most part, the level of expectation isn’t as high as the blogger perceives it to be. And while we, as bloggers, can’t always properly gauge what level that is, or adjust our own expectations for ourselves down, we can do things to combat that pressure to perform instead of resorting to extremes.

So what can be done when faced with a bout of performance anxiety?

Mix things up.

If it’s our reviews that are causing us stress, change up the format once in awhile and gauge our readers’ reactions and interest. It’s likely they’ll appreciate the variety rather than the same old-same old.

If it’s coming up with serious topics for our discussion or meme posts, then add some levity, fun or silliness. Not everyone wants to think about, read or participate in those hard-hitting topical discussions all the time. Opening up the discussion to favorite character archetypes, love triangles, cliffhanger endings can take the pressure off and can invite different readers to contribute to the conversation.

If it’s our weekly features that are causing us to hyperventilate, change them into bi-weekly or monthly round-up posts. Change up the day of the week we post them every so often, so as not to lock us in to one particular day each week we provide that specific content.

Don’t wear the “expert” mantle.

If your readers or followers try to pin the label of “expert” on you, consistently make sure you negate that label. If you don’t want the pressure to perform at the level an expert would, don’t take it on.

Being an expert will make you the “go to” blogger for information about whatever you’re claiming to be an expert on. Whether it’s in the way you reach out to publishers and authors, the way you conduct yourself at blogger events, the way you earn income on your blog, the way you handle review requests, the way you code your posts, if you claim “expert” status you will be expected to be the expert.

Aim lower.

If you really can’t handle being at the top, if trying to be the best is making your ideas and creativity dry up, aim just a little bit lower. Do what you can do, not what you think you should do.

If you’re having one of those off days where the words just won’t come, but a review or post is expected of you, just put down those words that do come to you. It’s better to perform than not perform at all. It’s better to have met your deadline than to have missed it, leaving those counting on you in the lurch.

As tough as it might be to lower your own expectations of yourself, the pressure will come off if you aren’t expecting greatness with each and every post or review.

Find something new.

The easiest way to get rid of your stage fright is to find something new – a new blog feature, a new review format, a new meme to participate in.

While coming up with new content might be a challenge in and of itself, the newness of the idea will definitely get those creative juices flowing. And without any previous posts to compare it to, there will be no prior expectation, by your readers at least, of how great an idea it is, how well-written it is, how well-executed it is.

Which can definitely help when performance anxiety has you in its grips.

So…

If you can’t manage your own expectations for yourself or those perceived expectations from your blog’s readers, then try to make a few tweaks here and there to see if it will cause that performance anxiety to diminish.

While a little fear is natural, feeling like you’re a deer caught in headlights when sitting down to write those reviews and posts isn’t helpful and will only get worse if you can’t find a way to get beyond the stress.

***

Do you have performance anxiety when it comes to writing content for your blog? Has it gotten worse the longer you’ve been blogging or has it gotten easier?

How do you get past your fear of not being as good as you once were, not achieving those same levels of excellence, not being as exciting, entertaining, interesting, topical?

Being a part of this community means just that. BEING. A PART. Of this COMMUNITY. It means being social. Not anti-social. It means joining in. Not staying on the sidelines. It means being together. Not being apart.

While it’s very possible to be a book blogger and not be a part of this community, it is not likely that blogger will be a successful book blogger if they aren’t in some way connected to the community. Without the social component of book blogging how can one hope to grow their blog? Promote their brand? Reach new readers? Connect with authors and publishers?

Unless that anti-social book blogger has already achieved celebrity status before they even decide to start their book blog, they will have a much harder time finding success in book blogging. I doubt if Stephen King or J.K. Rowling decided to blog about books they’d need to utter a single “peep” on Twitter or respond to a single comment to have a legion of followers.

Socially quiet celebrities aside, the rest of us have to achieve some level of sociability in order to succeed. Yet many of us in this community have a tendency toward being the opposite of social. We like to keep our noses buried in books. We like to share our thoughts via the written word versus the spoken one. We’d much rather hang out with a few close friends than attend a large-scale event with thousands of strangers.

And yet to be a book blogger with a modicum of success we must push past those tendencies, those fears, and reach out to others, interact with others, connect with others.

Not always the easiest of feats at the best of times. A near impossibility at the worst.

But in order for us not to see a dip in our stats, to watch our follower count diminish, to witness our online friends make new friends, we have to constantly keep ourselves a part of the social. Even when we don’t feel up to it.

Because while for most of us blogging is a “hobby,” in that most of us don’t get compensated for what we do, many of us choose to run our blogs like we would a business. And as such we can’t afford to retreat into our shells. We can’t hide out until we feel ready to reconnect. We can’t take a “time out” unless we are prepared to lose. Readers. Followers. Opportunities. Friends.

However, without that thing called a paycheck it’s that much harder to put on our smiling face – or even our snarky one – when we don’t feel like it. It’s hard to cheer for a book’s release when we feel anything but cheery if our lack of joy won’t result in our rent being unpaid. It’s hard to join in the conversation when we don’t feel like we have a single word to contribute if our absence won’t result in the termination from our employment.

And it’s the opposite of easy to be a participant when not lured in by the almighty dollar if we don’t know, don’t like or don’t trust those we must participate with.

For those of us who look at their blogs as a business and themselves as the face of their brand, it’s easier to get that game face on. The idea of backsliding after all the effort in building their brand can help to motivate them to keep going when everything inside of them says to step away. And if being social is a key component of what makes them a success, then they have even more incentive to “suck it up” than those who derive their success from other aspects of blogging.

But even for those bloggers who don’t wish to see their traffic decrease, their followers find new bloggers to follow, their brand begin to tarnish, stepping into their online persona when it is just so easy to stay offline can be a challenge.

So what can be done?

When you’re just not in the right headspace to answer those tweets, respond to those comments or check those emails there are a few things you can do so as not to completely alienate those loyal to you.

Take a break.

Take a day. Take a few days. Take a week. Sometimes just stepping away from the social for a short time can get you back to where you want to be. People will understand your need for “you” time. But be sure to let everyone know before you do.

• Send out a tweet letting everyone know you’re stepping away for a little while and will respond when you return.
• Set up an automated reply on your email to let everyone know that you won’t be looking at – or responding to – any email during your absense.
• Write a blog post. If your absence is going to be for longer than a day or two, let people know via post that you won’t be around even though you might have scheduled posts going up while you’re gone.

As long as you keep your followers informed they should be understanding about your need to take some time for you.

Write a post.

Sometimes the best way to get yourself back into the mood to be a part of the social sphere is to share your thoughts and feelings about your current lack of sociability. Reading other people’s comments who relate, commiserate, sympathize or empathize with your plight can often be the boost you need to get back into the game.

Attend a bookish event or signing.

You don’t have to announce who you are. Just go. Listen to those authors talk about their craft, read a passage from their latest release, share their enthusiasm for what they do with their readers.

If books are what you are passionate about, hearing from the authors can really help remind you of just why you do what you do and make you want to once again be a part of the conversation.

Re-read a favorite book or dive into a new book you’ve been dying to read.

While the act of reading itself might keep you away from the social for a few hours, reading a book that you just can’t help but want to talk about with others might be enough to entice you back into the community.

You became a book blogger to share your thoughts with other like-minded readers. And if you’ve read a book that has you squeeing with excitement, freaking out because of an oh em gee moment, or going crazy because of an insane cliffhanger ending, resisting the temptation to share those emotions won’t be easy. So why resist?

Bookstrap – a.k.a. fake it ’til you make it.

While I’m not the biggest believer in bootstrapping, for some it really does seem to work.

If you don’t feel social, be extra social. If you don’t want to respond to any email, respond to them all… or if your email box is out of hand, then tackle as many as you can handle. If you don’t want to share your thoughts on Twitter, share as many as you can get away with without looking a bit mad. If you’re not in the mood to tell Facebook “what’s on your mind” do it anyway. Even if whatever is on your mind isn’t of the happy, happy variety.

Just do something. And do it quickly.

Because doing nothing, floundering between being completely anti-social and semi-social, will distance you from the community whether you meant for that to happen or not.

Everyone understands the need to go quiet for awhile. The need to be completely anti-social. But patience and understanding only last for so long. And if you choose to be a part of the community, then it means BEING a PART of the COMMUNITY. You can’t have it both ways.

But that’s what I think. What about you?

Do you feel the need to take a step back from the social now and again? How has it affected your standing in the community? How has pulling back affected your followers on social media?

Has taking a break helped you realize that you missed the social aspects of book blogging more than you disliked, grew weary of, or were frustrated by them? Or has it made you realize that you prefer quiet solitude to community?

And if you have found yourself in a particularly anti-social mood, what have you done to combat it?

When I started my blog two some odd years ago, I didn’t even know there was such a thing as a blogosphere. I didn’t know there were things such as book blogs. I didn’t know there was a community to be a part of.

There was just me. My books. The thoughts in my head. And a platform on which to pour them out.

Every day – sometimes more than once a day – I’d rush to write down my ideas about the books I’d read, share my opinions about books coming soon and share my thoughts about things that loosely related to books. I didn’t really have an audience for any of these writings. I didn’t know there was a targeted audience to be found. I didn’t know there were people just like me who’d been doing this a lot longer and a lot better than I was.

All that knowledge came later. Not much later. But later nonetheless.

But I also didn’t know I had to approach my blogging like I would a battlefield. I didn’t know I had to come prepared for war. And maybe I didn’t. Not then anyway. But maybe I should have.

For some, it seems, blogging is a competition. A competition to see who can be the most popular, who can get the most attention from the publishers and authors, who can get the most friends, the most comments, the most pageviews.

For some blogging is more akin to a business. One in which to make a name for oneself. One in which to derive income. One in which to branch out ones skills into other, but related, areas.

And for some it’s a platform. To speak their voice the loudest. To be heard by the most. To be recognized, touted, revered.

While these may not be the majority of the bloggers in the book blogosphere, they tend to be the most visible because they’re looking for popularity, attention, compensation. And as there are so few spots at the top, whether or not they want to battle, they often have to. But that’s a choice they make. That’s an achievement they’re prepared to fight for. That’s a position they want to hold.

For some, these bloggers are representative of the ultimate goal. They are the icons, the pillars, the role models. Their behaviors and actions are closely watched and modeled after. If they approach blogging like it’s a competition, so will those who want to be like them. If they approach it, instead, with a gameplan or marketing strategy, so too will those who seek to find the same successes.

For others they represent an impossible to achieve status, yet one they strive for regardless. While these bloggers may not follow in their footsteps so closely, they do look to them to see how they too might succeed. They do look to them for guidance, for wisdom. And if they perceive competitiveness as the only way to achieve that status, they may adopt a similar approach.

And yet for others they are symbolic of all the things they dislike in the “real world” – elitism, popularity, unfair treatment, perceived arrogance – which sparks feelings of inferiority, jealousy, envy, hate. These bloggers may wait quietly in the wings for those at the top to fail, to fall, to disappear. Jumping on the “hate” bandwagon only after their decline. Or they may take action, looking for the cracks in their armor, trying to find a way to remove them from the spotlight they don’t feel these vaunted bloggers deserve to be in.

All of which serves to create an “interesting” dynamic in a community that is rather large but often feels rather small. Between those striving for number one and those envious of those at the top – the “chosen few” – a less than harmonic environment is created. And those caught in the crossfire are the bloggers who don’t wish to aim quite so high or don’t harbor feelings of ill will toward those who succeed.

These bloggers, who are perfectly content being somewhere in the middle, simply sharing their thoughts and ideas, being happy with the following they have, enjoying the praise and books they do receive, are the ones that often get dragged into the fight unwittingly.

And sadly they’re the ones who often become too battle weary to continue.

They’re the ones who are left scratching their heads wondering how the landscape became that of a battleground where they are forced to choose sides, forced to become sentinels for their original ideas, their posts, their voice. They’re the ones left wondering if it’s really worth it when their aim was never to battle for the top spot or to join the revolution against those who hold those positions.

And this “silent majority,” who are the staples in this community, are often overshadowed by the dramas that give the book blogging community a bad name. They’re the hard workers who do this day in and day out without recompense, without glory, without drama. They are the bloggers who put in the enormous amount of time and effort simply to share their voice with anyone who’ll listen. They are doing this simply for the love of books and authors and community. Nothing more.

They’re the ones who are ill prepared, ill equipped or unwilling to fight. And yet they often have to. To protect their ideas. To protect their content. To protect their integrity.

They’re the ones whose reviews most often get “lifted,” as the thieves think no one will notice. They’re the ones who feel kowtowed into silence when a wrong has been committed as they don’t feel anyone will believe them or that they won’t have help in their fight for what is right. They’re the ones who suffer when their reviews are attacked for being too positive/negative/fan-girly/critical.

And they’re the ones who have to decide, if they believe that blogging is a battleground, whether it’s all worth it.

My thoughts…

When you put yourself out there and share your ideas in an open environment, there is always a risk. A risk of them going unnoticed. A risk of them being disliked. A risk of them being copied or stolen.

When joining a community there are also risks. Risks of not being accepted or liked, of being unnoticed, of getting drawn into situations you otherwise might not want to be a part of.

But there are also rewards. Of having your thoughts read. Of connecting with those who have similar thoughts and ideas. Of learning new things. Of meeting new people. Of finding new friends.

So, if having to be prepared to fight for your ideas, your friends, your place in the community is a part of being in this community, the question ultimately is whether you perceive the effort to do so worth the “reward” you receive.

And for me? Today I say yes.

It is that time again. Time to set goals for the year, to look back at the year behind and see if I reached any of those goals that I set, and to jump-start the new year with enthusiasm, excitement and a game plan.

I am excited to start the new year. I am enthusiastic about the opportunities ahead. I am proud of some of my accomplishments from this past year and disappointed in myself with regard to a few other things.

I do have goals, which I realize now may be more akin to wishes. But that’s okay. I’m not much of a goal-oriented person. As long as I aim for something in the direction of those goals, I consider that a win.

But a game plan? That I do not have.

I’ve come to accept the fact that in blogging, as in writing, I’m a bit of a pantster. If I have an idea, I’m usually up and running with it within a day or two. If I decide I want to stop doing something I end that just as quickly. I don’t think about these things, mull them over. I just run with them. Well, after bouncing them off my sounding board – a.k.a. Jaime of Two Chicks on Books. I learned my lesson about going it alone with the SSRC.

I just took a peek at my past two end-of-year posts – 2010 and 2011 – and I’m a little bit intrigued by the fact that as the year 2011 dawned I was full of energy, hope and excitement about blogging and as 2012 approached I was exhausted.

For some reason this year I’m not quite as worn down. Even with umpteen blogs and a million and one tours scheduled, being a co-owner of a tour company and being a co-host of a year-long reading challenge, I’m still not as drained as I was at the start of 2012. Which is a good thing, I think.

Clearly it’s all about state of mind. Because I am more overloaded than ever, and yet I don’t feel half as run down as I did at this time last year. Maybe it’s having a fresh new look for my blog? Or maybe it’s that I’ve learned that it’s not the end of the world if I just read a book without reviewing it.

But whatever the reason, I’m happy to be here to start this third full calendar year on the blog and to see just what develops.

Looking Back…

While I feel I just wrote this post, and am still shocked that 365 days have passed since the last one, here I am. Last year I set forth ten goals, almost all of which I failed at. Epically.

It’s almost as if I decide to call something a goal it will definitely not get done. At least that’s what I’m assuming happened in 2012. But I still plan on setting forth goals for this year, because without them, without direction, I will just be aimless. And that, for me, is not a good thing.

But here’s how I did with this past year’s goals.

So, overall it was a big FAIL. But I refuse to let that discourage me. I have set goals for 2013 and I am still going to try to aim for them. I don’t think last year’s goals were unrealistic and neither are my new goals. All I can do is try. Right?

Last year I decided not to take a long look back. And I’m still of that mindset. Looking back can be helpful to see what needs to change in order to better oneself, but it’s all about looking forward. Spending too much time fondly reminiscing just keeps one stuck in the past.

But I thought a quick peek at some of the highlight and lowlights of my year wouldn’t be a bad thing.

2012 Highlights

The SSRC. A lot of work but so worth it. I got to fall in love with this series all over again. I got to meet some amazing readers and bloggers who were just as enthusiastic about this series as I am. I got to know the author behind the series just a little bit better.

The AARS event. Also a LOT of work, but overall worth it. I got to stretch myself beyond my comfort zone by reaching out to authors to ask for their participation. I got to write a few interviews for the tour which also made me realize that coming up with interview questions is not as scary as I always thought it was.

Milestone posts. I reached the 1,000 mark in published posts this year. I reached the 100 mark for my Book Watch Releasing This Week feature. While I don’t number them, I know I hit the 100 mark for my Book Watch feature posts as I started those long before the RTW ones.

Blog designs. I got some amazing designs, redesigns and re-redesigns by Parajunkee Design. Here on Fiktshun, I think I’ve finally settled in to one that I plan on living with for a long while. It helps that I have a few swappable headers, but I don’t think I could love any design more than this one.

Reading. I’ve read some amazing books this year. I am always pleasantly surprised by the fact that I can still be wowed by books where I am so jaded by film. And discovering new stories from the authors I love that will transport me and finding new authors who will do the same, is why I continue to do this blogging thing and will always list reading as my number one favorite way to spend my “me” time.

Writing. “Winning” NaNoWriMo was huge for me. Having failed the year before made me feel like… well… a failure. Having a WIP that is now around 250 pages long is an accomplishment I never thought I’d achieve. Now if I can just finish the darn thing and start on that other idea….

2012 Lowlights

Drama. Drama will always top the list of all things low. But I won’t talk about drama here because it isn’t how I want to start off the new year, I don’t want to bring negativity to the blog, and it’s not worth my time and energy to think about.

Self-doubt. By not reaching out to publishers for ARCs and playing that head-game this past year I thought I’d be able to avoid this one. But alas, no. I question everything. I worry about everything. And I found myself on more than one occasion wondering whether my blog was good enough, my content was entertaining enough, my reviews were well-written enough. While the doubt wasn’t all-encompassing, it was there.

Stress. Ahhh, stress. I am someone who overanalyzes everything. I over-think everything. I over-worry about everything. So stress is a part of my life. Always. But it doesn’t mean I want it to be there. And it doesn’t mean it isn’t a low.

Saying goodbye to My Reading Pile. I hate giving something up. On anything blog-related. But especially that blog, as it was just so fun and pretty. But it didn’t make sense to keep it going when I could have all those posts on my other blog. I thought about giving up The Annex, but after a revamped design and a rebranding it didn’t make sense to keep both. And The Annex won out as it was more versatile.

So….

That’s about it. There are things I wish I’d done more of, things I wish I hadn’t gotten involved in at all, things I wish I’d done differently, things I wish I’d never said. But the past can’t be changed… unless time travel really does become possible and I’m somehow the guinea pig for the world’s first time machine.

But until then, I’m done with looking back unless it will help me to improve my present and future.

***

…Looking Ahead

Okay, this post is getting OOC long, so I’ll try to keep this intro to my goals/resolutions fairly brief and not ramble on and on and on like I normally would. But I will ramble just a little.

I am looking forward to the new year here on this blog and my other blogs. I am hopeful that I’ll be able to continue blogging as I have been, for this year and many to come. I hope to find a better blog-life balance this year. And I hope to discover so many more amazing books and authors.

I would love to find a level of confidence I don’t yet have so I can improve my blog in ways I’ve been heretofore too timid to do. And I would love, love, love to attend the RT Convention this year for the entire week, because that would be amazing. But those aren’t goals, just wishes.

So that’s ten. If I tried to list any more than ten it would result in total failure across the board. Ten is a reachable goal. And I don’t think I’ve aimed for anything too “pie-in-the-sky.”

And no, I didn’t list things like improving SEO, increasing blog traffic and page views or finding ways to gain new followers or unique visitors. While all those things would be awesome, they’re not what drive me to blog. This isn’t a money-making endeavor for me. It isn’t a popularity contest. I’m not trying to be the next celebrity blogger. So my goals don’t fall along those lines.

Of course I’d love it if 500 or more unique visitors stopped by every day, rather than just some days, to read my posts. That would be a huge ego boost. But I’m just as happy to have the viewers I do have.

And while having the goal of monetizing my blog would be a great way to drive me to keep going year-after-year, it’s not the kind of blogger I want to be. For me, this is mostly a creative outlet. A place to share my thoughts and to “pimp” those books I adore. It gives me the excuse to create fun badges and buttons and buy the ones I am not skilled enough to create on my own.

My blog will always be a mid-tier blog and I’ve discovered that’s exactly where I’m happy. Right in the middle. Nestled in between those awesome blogs I look up to and those new blogs I’m so excited for.

Anyway….

No I didn’t set a goal of reducing the number of times I use ellipses or I segue to a new topic by saying “anyway.”

I’m really excited about heading into 2013 and reaching new milestones this year – 300,000 page views, which should happen in the next few weeks, 200,000 visitors, which should happen shortly thereafter, reaching the three-year mark on this blog in November, and possibly having 1,500 published posts by year-end.

And whether you’re a new blogger or an established one, I hope that your year in blogging past was everything you hoped it would be and your year in blogging ahead is everything you dream it will be.

Welcome to 2013 and I hope to see you around the blogosphere!